step forward

"That's crazy."

So, it is. That's okay. 

Listen, a little bit of crazy is a good thing.

You know that outfit you were a little too afraid to wear, because, you know, what will they think- isn't it a little too out there?

You know that hairstyle you liked, the one that you quickly undid, because, you know, no one puts their hair up like that, do they?

You know that sentence you almost blurted out, but then decided to bite your tongue at the last moment, because, you know, wouldn't that have been a stupid thing to say?

You know that thing you almost did, before someone else doubted you and made you back down, because, you know, who were you to try something new, something out of your comfort zone, something no one else thought you'd be able to do? You'd probably just screw it up anyway, wouldn't you? 

So, just keep quiet. Don't voice what you think or feel.

Stay back. Yes, that's where you belong, there at the back.

Don't step over the line. It's there, can't you see it?

No. 

Stop. The world has damaged your thinking, our thinking. The world has forced you into a shape you don't fit in.

The line? You know what? You made it up with your own mind. It's a figment of your imagination. It's not there. You're hallucinating. Just step forward. Stop standing still.

Doesn't that feel crazy? To break through your own boundaries? Boundaries that society taught you to build.

But like I said. A little bit of crazy is a good thing.

I want you to find yourself. Somewhere inside you've locked that person behind bars, and you lost the key. I'm telling you to get it back, to go looking for it. Okay? Because I want you to set yourself free.

| NOTE: my own image / no stealing please- pinning is allowed |

simple days

Some days, nothing is simple anymore. It's always pieces being broken into smaller pieces, chaotic mess, more and more of it unraveling everyday. It's picking up things that keep falling down, it's waking up when I don't want to, it's too many words spoken at once, it's constantly multitasking, it's unnecessary distractions, it's time limits and deadlines, it's an intricate string of miss happenings and undone work and mistakes twisting around me. It's the feeling that I can't breathe. Or it's the feeling that I'm stuck in a tiny room, walls on every side of me, too close, cramping me, and squeezing all feeling out of my body until I'm numb all over.

Yes, some days, everything piles up until it's too much for me.

And other days, other days...I wake up by my own choice, and I open my eyes to a warm sunrise filtering through the windows onto my bed. And I get to drink my tea, and read my book, and sit outside on the grass with the sun on my back, and write and let the feeling I get when I write sink in and relieve and refresh and comfort. I get to draw, to clear my head, to dance and twirl to a Taylor Swift song in my room. I get to stand and watch the sunset fade at the end of the day.

Some days it is simple again.

alone

So, if you lose it all, who are you going to turn to?

Who are you going to run to?

You think you're fine all by yourself, alone.
But you're wrong.

You need someone.

We all need someone.

every minute of it

{my own image, taken with my iPhone -I am going through a stage in which I am constantly obsessing over daisies}

It's October, October 2014. This month will never happen again. This day will never happen again.
Just the way I probably won't be able to pick up my younger brothers for much longer.
Or the way I won't always be able to tell the people I love that I really do love them.
Or the way I will never be the same person again, the same person that I am today.
Or even the way that the daisies that are blooming in our garden will die eventually and will never come back to life or be able to bloom again.

We live in a universe that is full of goodbyes and endings.

My advice? Savor it. Enjoy your life, every minute of it. It's a gift from God.

Jeremiah 29:11  For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

the real you

via

I look into your eyes, I can see your disguise. And I can tell, oh, oh, oh, you don’t want me to know. No, no, no…

You don’t want me to know, to ever know the real you. You don’t want to tell me, all you’ve been through. But I want you to know, you can share them with me, all of those secrets you keep, all those things that hurt badly, things that keep you from sleep.

You don’t feel worth the effort, of me listening to you, about all those things that hurt.
But what you don’t know, is that I do want to know. I want to know you. I promise you’re worth that, and so much more. You should tell your story, let it out and let it be.

I look into those eyes, and see that disguise. I know you put on your smile and tell yourself to hold on a while. But past all your braveness, you’re even more precious. 

Sometimes, when you let down your guard, I can see through the mask, and I see the broken sadness inside.

And I know how it is, I've been through pain too. But you don’t have to hide anymore, not from me, I want to know the real you.
Beautiful, real, you...

///

It might be poetry, because I did rhyme here and there, but it might not be. Let's call it a story. A story that happens all the time in the world, someone hiding their true self. Don't do it...we make mistakes, and we learn, and by the glory of God, we are forgiven. Let people know that you have also been damaged (even if it's albeit a little) in life, but you have been healed and loved by your Father in heaven. Let people know the real you, for who you are, who God has been forming you to be - and most of all, let them know that this is not it, this is not the finished product. God is working on you and with you.

We all still have a long way to go. Don't fake being someone else all the way.

 For me, it is the person I am through God that I want to show. That is who I want to be the real me.

And I encourage you to be the real you.

Warrior

via // another one I want to use for my photo challenge

Energy sweeps through her body
The wind runs through her golden hair
She stands on the hill for all to see
For all who want to look up and stare

Her sea green eyes are alight with a glow
Her pale skin looks white against the grey sky
She stands steady in the deep snow

She's different and only a few know why

And oh, it's the presence of a fiery soul
One that doesn't give up in this dark cold world
Oh, it's the presence of a warrior soul
She has been hurt, she has been whirled

In the crazy tornado called life

Yes she has been wrong, she has lied
But He saved her and now she's stronger than before

She is only for Him inside and outside

Since He picked her up off the cold hard floor

And I can tell you who she is
She is a warrior
She is living for him, she is His
 Alive for her savior

She's been through some hard times
But she decided she didn't want to let that get in her way
She's been through some bad times
But when she felt like giving up, she told herself to stay

And she's not going to stop
He is in her and will take their breath away
With her story as the backdrop
His love shouts from within her everyday

She is a warrior
Living for her savior
She has Him as her leader
And she is a warrior

///

a poem I wrote, about some people I know. I can see God's love shining through them, so this is dedicated to them.


^ that might have had something to do with inspiring me to write this as well. I found it on Pinterest.
{via}
oh, and, happy 4th of July to all my American friends.

You Have My Heart {a poem}

^ Photo credit goes to my sister, Grace.

You have my heart

You hold it in your hands
You have my future
And all of my plans
You are the only one there
To catch me when I fall
You are the only one there
To start me up again when I stall

And something tells me
I can trust you, I can trust in you
And maybe it's the way you see

You see that we're all beautiful

I can trust You
You wiped my tears when I cried
So it must be true
You said and You have never lied
I put my trust in You

You have my heart in your hands
And something tells me
You will take care
You will hold it gently

I know because
When I was alone
 I didn't know what to do
There was no one
But there was you.

God loves us so much...some days, mostly on the worst days, a ray of God's brilliant love breaks through the clouds of depression and loneliness, into your day. And because of the contrast those dark clouds create, His love shines even brighter than you imagined.
Sometimes, when I really believed that I was alone in this world, I found Him waiting to hold me in His arms.
He never leaves us alone.

This poem was about the moment when you realize, someone really does love you with all of their heart, someone does care for you in the most beautiful way.
And, guess what? That just happens to be the Creator of this whole universe.

she missed simplicity

{via}

Simple.

When was the last time her life had felt simple?
When had it gotten so complicated?

There had been chaos, there had been frustration, anger, fear sorrow, there had been magic moments, beautiful and perfect moments, and moments when she felt as though she could go no farther.

There had been those happy days where she'd spent her time walking and singing in the garden among the flowers and trees, or inside the house with a book in her hands, when her problems had not  felt so severe, even though they were still there.

But where was the simplicity? The same simplicity that had always around when she had been younger?

Gone.

And she missed it.

Entry for Eve's writing contest // Go Somewhere

[VIA. Not my own image]

Let’s leave right now, just you and me
I don’t know where we’re going
Guess we’ll have to just wait and see
So let’s grab the car keys

We can drive with the window down
Let the fresh air in and feel the wind blow
We can go from town to town
I don’t know where we’ll go but I want to go

Let’s get in the car,
Drive to some place far
‘Cause I need to get away for awhile
Need to feel the return of a smile

You can hold the pedal down
We can sit back and listen to the engine roar
I’ll put some music on
The kind that sends shivers to your core

Starting now I want to go somewhere
As long as it’s not here I don’t care

Let’s leave right now, just you and me
Let’s get in the car
and go someplace far

‘Cause I long to explore
I want my life to be so much more
Then what it was before
I’m hungry to taste a new world
and I want you to come as well

It’s not that I don’t like this place
I guess you could say it’s a desperate case
I just want to see things I haven’t seen
and go to all the places I haven’t been

Starting now I want to go somewhere
As long as it's not here I really don't care

Author's note: Hmm...my conclusion is that this poem is about wanderlust. I didn't know till now, I just let it take me where it wanted to.

Hey guys! I know I said I'm meant to be really busy with packing up and stuff, but I decided I would enter Eve's writing contest with this (two days till the deadline!).

Oh, and, Eve's contest is awesome. You should check it out and enter. Thanks for hosting it, Eve. :)

Thank you so much for reading, it means a lot to me. Love all of my followers! What do you think of my entry? I was slightly disappointed with the way it turned out, but I don't have much time to write another one now, so, here goes...

Postscript: Hello June! What do you mean to me? Well, since I live in South Africa, Somerset-West, you mean cold, windy, and wet as Winter begins. Preparing myself. I love you but I somehow find myself dreaming about December or January whenever you come around...strange thing is that I wish for you when they are around. ♥
(You may be slightly confused, person who is reading this postscript...well, only if you're American. But anyway, most of you probably already know, that when it's your Summer time, it's my Winter time.)

that is what comes with change

{VIA} (image not my own - found it on Pinterest...isn't it beautiful? I love the atmosphere. So inspiring)

you ask why she's like that

why sometimes when she smiles-

her eyes are sad.

well, the story is something you may not buy

but it is a story that needs to be told

so I will tell you why.

There came a time in her life, when gone was the girl who smiled so bright- the girl who fell asleep easily at night. The girl who didn't always have to dry her eyes, the girl who didn't always wear a fake disguise. The girl who danced all the time and sang loud, the girl who's sky wasn't darkened by a heavy cloud.

That girl was no more for awhile, because in her place came a girl who did not smile.
A girl who always lied and said she was alright, not knowing why she didn't want anyone to know the truth. A girl who had turned her back on the world because of change, a girl who was not fulled with sweet youth. A girl who always had to dry her eyes, and made sure to put on a fake disguise- because even though people could already see her sorrow, she knew for sure it was much worse inside.
And eventually the first girl came back, and claimed what she had left behind, her heart. But still the other girl was always somewhere around, and in the first girl's new world, she always took some part.
Nothing about her was ever the same. But that is what comes with change.

and that, that is the reason why,

you sometimes see her smile with sad eyes.

let me tell you, though,

even though things did not go her way

she is okay.

she will be okay.

///

Change can be for the better or the worse. This post was about change for the worse. It happens. It will always happen until we go home to our Jesus, and then we will live in a perfect infinity.

I'm working on a post about change for the better, but it will take quite a while, life is busy. 

I love writing and I hope you enjoyed reading this. ♥♥♥

PS: I will not be active here for...like...a month. My family and I are moving out of our rented house to a new house (yay! a house that is actually ours), and it's going to get a lot busier very soon. So I send apologies in advance, I will be quite absent for a while.

dandelion

{VIA}

a s m i l e was on her face

as she picked the d a n d e l i o n

s o m e h ow dandelions always made her smile

and even though there were w o r r i e s 

in the f u t u r e that belonged to her

she c h o s e to smile

because as she blew s o f t l y on that dandelion

she k n e w that it would all be fine

and s o m e h o w

that d a n d e l i o n

that she held b e t w e e n her fingers
managed to give her h o p e

to c a r r y on.

there are meanings in little things. I see dandelions as a signal of hope.

try and see them too

image my own

when you look in the mirror
when you judge yourself for everything you do,
and you don't like it,
you don't like you-
the problem is that

you have been focusing

on all the bad things about yourself

for so long 

that you've forgotten

how to see

all the good things about yourself.

and let me tell you, dear-

there are so many good things

about you.
try and see them too.

{this post was inspired by a quote found on Pinterest: if I could give you one thing, I would give you the ability to see yourself through my eyes, so that you can finally see how beautiful you are.}

words on wednesday

words. they're amazing. they describe, they label, they are put together to make lyrics and poems. they dance in the minds of the people who like to play with them, they wander not knowing which one will be chosen and spoken in the minds of the unsure or sad. there are words that have been hurried out and not chosen well by someone who is scared or hurt or angry. they're used to talk about feelings in the mouths of all people.
and every word means something.
there's a quote about words that I like:

Words are like X-Rays. If you use them right, they can pierce right through you.

that's true. they can pierce through you and full you with something new, something good. but sometimes they can pierce through you and leave you feeling empty or heart broken.
we have to be careful how we use words.

and here are some wonderful ones. kick back and relax if you're planning to read on, because this will be quite a long post.

I'm sure we've all encountered a selcouth or two somewhere along the path of the life we've lived so far.

I have a smultronställe. do you? :) I've actually always wondered what this was called. now my curiosity on that matter is tamed. {fun-fact: don't know how to make an A with two dots above using the keyboard? alt 0228. try it and it will make that A for you. (hold down alt till you've typed all of those numbers, then let go)}

I love adoxography. tip: people seem to like adoxography posts {saying this because I do}, so, if you don't know what to post, maybe you should go for that.

that wonderful smell...

had a bad case of clinomania yesterday morning.

♥♥♥

can't tell you how many times I've felt this. didn't know the word for it till now.

I clearly have a logolepsy.

kalon...the beauty inside.

ever felt some tarantism?

I made the images myself, the words I found on Pinterest.

I hope you've enjoyed learning these new words. they are all selcouth.

have a lovely Wednesday. ♥

to see the stars

typography design by me - quote found on Pinterest.

and when life gets dark...hold on, because pretty soon, the first star is going to come out, and then another will follow it, and another, until the whole sky sparkles and twinkles with starlight streaks. who knows, maybe some of their shine will rub off on you, shine that you can keep till daylight comes, and even longer then that, because maybe you'll keep that shine forever.

don't be afraid to dance

via

You want to do it. You know you might be able to get it right. But the courage just isn't with you...what if they laugh, or what if something goes wrong? You'll be forever branded with it, won't you? Maybe it's better not to try at all. You don't have to take the chance after all.

Let me tell you, that's something I struggle to not listen to. It's thrown at me constantly by myself mentally, whenever I think of taking a chance, whenever I think of trying something new.
But the thing is, I've finally come to learn - taking the chance and failing feels so much better than not taking the chance at all. And even then, taking a chance does not always lead to failing. There are many triumphs to be made.
So don't be afraid to dance like nobody is watching. If you fall, it's okay, you can still get up again. It's not impossible to pick yourself up.

Don't be afraid to take the chance, darling.

the wind is free

Hello, my lovely readers. First off, I hope you had a wonderful Easter. He is risen!
And next- here is another poem. About one of my favorite things. (btw: I have a lot of favorite things)

the wind blows hard 

howling and whispering at the same time
I’m sure it’s calling me
and I wish I could go with the wind
and I’m wishing as hard as the wind is blowing.
somehow I think that if I just believe…

wherever it’s going
I want the wind to take me.
and I don’t know where it’s going
but I do know why I want to go too

the wind is free
the wind is wild
the wind knows how to sing
the wind has been everywhere
and seen everything

the wind is free
and that’s what I want
for me.

when the wind is sad

it flies soft and low
letting out melancholy notes
moving so slow.

when the wind is happy
it whips against the leaves in the trees
and skims across the ocean
lifting waves
and making the whole world
move in harmony
swaying ever so gently.

when the wind is angry
you can feel something in the air
it feels like danger and storms
and when the wind hits your face
it stings with cold

when the wind is full of passion
it blows hard, so hard
it could lift you off your feet and carry you away
but somehow it doesn't
it leaves you with just a taste
of how strong that passion is.
it leaves you wanting more
of that exhilarating feeling
that comes with passionate wind.

I want to fly with the wind
I want to go to the heights that the wind has gone
I want to zoom across skyscrapers
to swerve between tall trees
to pass over mountain tops
to put light feathers in the air
and watch them swirl

wherever it’s going
I want the wind to take me.
and I don’t know where it’s going
but I do know why I want to go too

the wind is free
the wind is strong
the wind is here
and the wind is gone
the wind can touch clouds
without breaking them
the wind knows just when
to give a sailboat a push
or give a bird it’s wings

the wind is free

so free
and that’s what I want
for me.

///

feeling f r e e,

Tane ♥

my thoughts are stars...

via

I recently read the book 'The Fault in our Stars'. It was a book worth reading. Sad, slightly confusing, and deeply moving. Made me cry. (If you've read this, you'll probably be thinking that you understand why I cried...)

The thing I liked most out of the book, is that Hazel (the main character) often pointed out a lot of true things.

My thoughts are stars, I can't fathom into constellations...

Yes. Yes...

I so often feel like that in my mind. Except, up until now, I didn't know how to put that feeling into words. And then, when I read that book, John Green put it into a sentence for me. I'm glad. And, yeah, that's all this post is really about. One of my new favorite quotes.

If you were to rate 'The Fault in our Stars' (assuming you've read it) out of five, what would you give it?