Wednesday Words [1] - Fading

FADING // written: 11.JUL.2016

something in the words that you say to me

make me feel stained and unwashed, dirty.

I know that I don’t hate you but oh I wish you knew how

the sharp and poisoned arrows that fly from your mouth

have been hitting me square in the chest for a while now

and I feel so small in the quiet corner where I crouch.

I would tell you but I have been taught to keep the silence

and the thoughts in my head scare me with their violence.

I am terribly afraid to let them out and yet

I am afraid to keep them inside my head

because they are making me bitter bit by bit

turning my once soft heart to lead.

here I hang from the tight rope I had been walking

I am holding on but I can feel that my grip is slipping

I don’t want it to but what little faith that I had left in you

is ever slowly fading, fading away into nothing.

-T.H.

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Hey all, how are you doing?

I think I ought to explain this post, just a little. So. I have a scheduled monthly post (eg: January Days, February Days - an update on what's going on in my life) that I (apparently) struggle to stick to, but I'm not going to stop trying. And me being me, I had this great idea to add to the load. Because I really like this idea. 

The idea is to have a scheduled, weekly, poetry post every Monday or Wednesday. You see, I have poems playing out in my head like all. The. Time. And sometimes (only sometimes) I want to share them, which has led to me deciding that I'll try and post poetry weekly, perhaps even twice a week. Either in a Monday Musings post or in a Wednesday Writings post (hence the title of this post). Writing poetry often helps me relieve or relive feelings I wouldn't been able to in any other way.

Some people pay for therapy. I write.

BUT. I have had people worry about me because of the 'depth' or 'pain' in the words that I write. All of my poetry is influenced by the things, relationships and people in my life, yes. But often I mix fiction in with all of it, and if you find something I've written a little dramatic, there's no need to worry or wonder if I 'need help' or actually need therapy after all. :) I do have a lot of happy, lighthearted musings and words ready to be penned down along with the darker thoughts. That's how life is, after all, the good mixed in with the bad. The shadows falling in the places where the sun isn't shining. It's a reflection.

I will probably also include a random photo or two of mine each time that will most likely not be related to what I write. You have been warned.

I hope you have a most lovely day. Remember that sometimes having a good day is a choice. Also, please forgive all of the (really annoying, aren't they?) brackets in this post. Till next time.