August Days, Part 1 | 2016

Not even going to say something about how awful I am for being so inconsistent in posting on my blog...

So. Hello.
It's already well into the month of August. It's almost springtime, which is exciting for me, because after spring comes summer.
This month has been full of ups and downs, as most months are, as life is. But some time periods are more extreme in the contrast of the good and the bad days. The thing is that life isn't supposed to be smooth and easy sailing when you're living for Jesus, even though it often feels like mine is. I think it's dangerous to just sail on in the smooth weather, because it can lead to becoming lukewarm. And I have no idea why I still get surprised when life gets bumpy after I've actually asked God to give me trials and challenges so that I might become more like Him. Jesus definitely didn't have an easy life, and He is my example. If you're experiencing something similar, I encourage you to sail on through the storm, it will bring you closer to Him in the end.

August has been...interesting. And full. Therefore, I'm going to split this post into two, because I have a lot of photos to share.
Lately, I have been...

+ braving a very windy day at the beach with (most) of my family. It was worth it. Even though the wind literally knocked me over and I found out that yes, my eyes are definitely bigger than my stomach, and I cannot finish that much ice cream. Luckily my dad was around to help me out.

 

+ and yes...if you haven't guessed by those photos- I'm REALLY ENJOYING having my sister back from Ireland. It's epic, but it's for a short while, since she leaves this Monday. So I'm savouring the time that I have left with her.

+ listening to music like almost all of the time. (A few favourites: 10,000 Reasons by Rend Collective, Write Your Story by Francesca Battistelli, Smoke and Fire by Sabrina Carpenter and Run by Matthew Mole.)

+ getting overly excited about been dubbed nineteen percent fluent by the app I have on my phone, Duolingo. Je parle français, donc je suis content. At least, I can speak a (very, very) little...

+ playing around with hand lettering as usual. I'm convinced it has a therapeutic effect on me.

+ eating frozen yogurt on a cold day in good company because we were all craving some froyo. Didn't manage to finish that either. But, when dad's not around, that's what brothers are for. (Actually, I think that was in June...oh well.)

+ looking back at photos taken when my younger sister and I flew to the Free State to visit friends in April.

+ looking forward to seeing this lovely person again soon.

What have you been up to?

Monday Musings [2] - Say Jesus

you don't know where they've been, 

no idea what they've seen

or the number of nights that 

they've cried themselves to sleep.

the words that have been spoken

into their ears and the images

that have been burned into their mind

are their constant reminders

so don't think you can bring them down

and I will just stay silent.

because I won't hide,

this that is bottled up inside of me

will spill over and I 

will do anything to make you see

past their clouded eyes into

souls that are broken and hungry

for something that is true.

it is up to us to tell them

that their wounds and their scars

don't ruin what is within

to tell them that all their fears

will not be able to win

to tell them that we know 

Someone stronger

Someone who is unlike any 

earthly father,

who longs for His children to 

take shelter

in His might that is 

so much bigger

than any danger

this world has to offer.

He can take away their shame,

He can give back their lost days

and when they ask His name,

we'll say

Jesus.

---

"Then the King will say to those on His right hand, 'Come, you blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: for I was hungry and you gave Me food; I was thirsty and you gave Me drink; I was a stranger and you took Me in; I was naked and you clothed Me; I was sick and you visited Me; I was in prison and you came to Me.' " / Matthew 25:34-36

"The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is long suffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance." / 2 Peter 3:9

Wednesday Words - [2]

there's something up ahead

that looks like a fresh start

as clean as the dawn of a new day

and tell me, can I help it when this 

stubborn heart of mine

tells me it's ready to give way

and I stop

because

there's this look on your face that

reminds me of when I was young

it takes me back to a place where

hope once grew with roots strong

and I think

there's a green shoot

growing in the soil of my soul

that makes my spirits lift

and this time I reckon

I'm going to water it.

He Is Trustworthy

Trust is powerful. It's putting something in someone's hands knowing they could drop it, but taking the chance anyway, because you believe they care about it enough to hold it tight. All of us learn that we have to be careful who we give it to, you have to know that they will do everything to keep it safe. Naive people give it more easily, but the thing is, we all start out naive. The jaggedness and crookedness of this life and the cruel beings in it teach us to be more discerning. To look a little closer. To watch our steps in case we fall over something.

For most, innocence is stolen from a young age. Often too young. You start realizing things, even small things, around six, or seven, like how a watermelon won't grow in your stomach if you swallow that pip, how your face won't actually stay stuck on the same expression if you scowl for too long. You no longer trust everything adults or even other kids say. As you get older, you realize other things too. Much worse things. You find out about human trafficking and serial killers and pornography and grotesque words.

Maybe those aren't perfect examples, but the point is that as you grow older, the world gets uglier. It was always ugly, but in our own little world of soft toys and knock knock jokes and pancakes for breakfast, we missed it. Until it became more clear with each birthday.

Four years old. Hold my hand when we walk across the street.

Eight years old. Stay close to me.

Ten years old. Don't talk to strangers.

Twelve years old. Careful who you're friends with.

Sixteen years old. Watch out for yourself.

Twenty years old and you've known that it's not a safe place for awhile now. You don't trust easily because that isn't smart. It's dangerous.

You learn. You become aware, you see things for what they are. It's the same for everyone, and it's rare to find someone that is still a kid at heart. (Though I'd like to add here that I love those kind of people)

When trust is given, it's kind of a big deal. If someone has handed it to you, don't think it's a small thing. It's precious, and you are fully responsible for what you do with it, how you respond to it. Perhaps the person who trusts you has been let down many times before, or perhaps they don't know betrayal yet. It will be up to you to live up to whatever you've let them believe you are.

And wait. Can I say something? Can I share hope with those that have remorseful, jaded and doubtful souls? There IS Someone you will never have to second guess. There IS Someone who is strong enough, mighty enough, yet kind and gentle enough to carry your precious trust. To carry you, you precious soul. He never lets go, He never stumbles or slumbers. His name is Jesus, and no matter who has hurt you or cracked open the chambers of your heart so that you had to rebuild them, you will be safe with Him.

He is not hateful like that person who looked at you like that. He is not cruel like that person who said those things to you. He is not malignant like that person who hurt you and the ones you love and never looked back.

He is pure, He is holy and He is loving.

He is trustworthy.

Put your hand in His, He will never let go.

"Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, and whose hope is in the Lord. For he shall be like a tree planted by the waters, which spreads out its roots by the river, and will not fear when the heat comes; but its leaf will be green, and will not be anxious in the year of drought, nor will cease from yielding fruit." / Jeremiah 17:7-8

Always He remains, our courage in the fight.

Monday Musings [1] - Meant For The Skies

hey, can you please
leave, and get out of my head?
I know you won't ease
any of this pain, heavy as led.

oh I know you're perfect, flawless
but I really don't want your face to be
what I imagine when I close my eyes,
because
the things I'd do for you scares me,
and you see
I'm pretty sure, yeah I'm sure
it isn't healthy
and I know, yeah I know for sure
that you aren't the answer.

I don't like how if I only had one choice I'd choose you,
or how I randomly think about the little things you do.
this power you got who knows how over me
has tied me up like a rope so tightly,
it's strong and I thought I knew how but now
I cannot seem to break free.

who knew
it was possible to feel like I can finally breathe
and find that I've run out of oxygen
at the same time.

so hey you, won't you be my hero
walk away, but do it fast, not slow
I'm meant to be a free bird
and I don't know if you know
that you've caged me so
I'm letting you know.

let me take off and use my own wings to soar again,

somehow I've become dependent on you
and it seems I like it when you say my name.
I know you don't mean it to but it's happening,
I'm falling, I'm falling,
but please don't catch me,
it will only make me want you to stay
and right now my mind is full of alarms
screaming out no, not today.
let me loose, set me free, let me fly,
I was meant for the skies.

I don't trust easily
and I have a hole in my heart, that's why
I thought it would be
me, myself and I
yet now
I can tell I want to give us a try,
but the problem is,
I was meant for the skies.

---

A/N: Call it what you want, I know it's sappy...but if you're honest, really honest, haven't you ever felt this way? Emotions are tricky things, hard to control. Sometimes it takes another person to help you rein them in.